The idea that moms should be selfless is still an all-too common stereotype, but in reality, neglecting our needs can leave us burned-out and resentful. Rest isn’t a luxury: showing up for yourself allows you to do the same for others while setting a positive example to your kids.
Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels
Author and board-certified physician Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith knows a thing or two about rest, and about being a mom: having had two babies within 21 months, Dr. Dalton-Smith developed her seven rest-types concept, which can help you to identify what you need and what you can do to recharge.
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Physical Rest
Physical rest involves restorative activities like massage. While home-spa treatments can be useful, what sets a luxury salon apart is the expertise, the ambience and the opportunity for social interaction, so if you have some money put aside (or a voucher you’ve been waiting to use), now’s the time.
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Mental Rest
For moms with busy brains, mental rest can help press the reset button. Clearing your mind can be as simple as engaging in some breathwork or listening to a mediation podcast, or if you prefer your mindfulness with some movement, going for a brisk walk or swim can also help.
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Spiritual Rest
Whether or not you consider yourself religious, spiritual rest is all about connecting to the bigger picture: whatever you consider that to be. In addition to religious practices, engaging in acts of kindness, such as bringing flowers to an older neighbor, or simply spending time in nature all help.
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Emotional Rest
Emotional regulation is an essential parenting skill, and it sets a great example for kids on how to express and process their emotions in a healthy way. Emotional rest is all about having a safe place to let it all out, whether that’s in a therapist’s office, a private journal or confiding in a trusted friend.
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Sensory Rest
Between feeling overstimulated and the pressure to be constantly “on”, it’s not uncommon for moms to feel overwhelmed, and sensory rest is about turning the volume down. Spa treatments like soundbaths and floatation therapy can be beneficial for this, or simply booking in an uninterrupted bath night for yourself.
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Social Rest
For some moms, motherhood can feel a little lonely at times. While many rest types focus on solitude, social rest is about spending quality time with people who recharge your batteries (while setting healthy boundaries with those who don’t). If this sounds like you, commit to spending an afternoon with a close friend, and if you want to decline an invitation, know that it’s perfectly acceptable to say no.
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Creative Rest
We’re all about nurturing our children’s creative skills, but don’t forget that our own creativity can help us flourish, both as individuals and as parents. If you feel hesitant about exploring this, remember you don’t have to be an accomplished artist; simply trying something new (such as a dance class or a craft project on Pinterest) can be enough to boost your confidence.
If you feel guilty about resting or that you don’t have enough time, remember that rest has a ripple-effect: If you’re well-rested, it also has a positive effect on those around you, so whether it’s five minutes’ meditation or an hour at the salon, set the date, book the babysitter, and enjoy yourself.
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