Read This To Save Your Marriage

Read This To Save Your Marriage

There’s a big difference between the occasional minor spat between a married couple and deep rooted issues that can sink a relationship. While it can be difficult to fathom at first, a marriage is less of a formal bond and more of something that needs to be actively worked on to stay healthy. As a result, when things begin to sour, it’s key to take active steps to try and bring things back to where they were.

Image credit Flickr via Vladimir Pustovit

Where Have Things Gone Wrong?

Like any project—and to be clear, that’s very much what this becomes—it’s good to start with a bit of a project map, a guideline to help you get your marriage back on track. A good thing to start and look at is some of the reasons that you fell in love with your partner in the first place. Sometimes, you’re having trouble keeping in touch with those traits that first drew you to someone, and taking an inventory of what they are may:

A. Give you some motivation to work towards fixing this.

B. Give you a better picture of what you would like to work towards. There are also several areas where marriages can become weak. Here are some of the more common examples.

· Communication gap: Lack of communication can be extremely damaging for a relationship. When couples stop sharing things with each other and expressing themselves, they weaken their chord of connection. And when their connection becomes fragile, their relationship also loses its strength. If your marriage is on the verge of falling apart, you must strengthen your connection by communicating more. Dearth of communication can drive a wedge between you and your partner.

· Infidelity: Cheating on your partner is mostly a deal breaker. If one of the partners in a relationship indulges in infidelity, it definitely damages the relationship.

· Lack of care and affection: With time passion fades in a relationship and couples stop showing affection and care towards each other. Eventually all the sweetness and warmth of the relationship goes away and there is no joy left in the marriage. This can cause marriage to fall apart.

· Crisis: Crisis situations can either make a marriage stronger or it can break it. In difficult times, how couples support each other determines how good or worse their relationship is going to get.

Some of these issues come from people’s actions, others are unavoidable, but they all can put a relationship under duress.

Using Your Resources

When you’ve pinpointed the issues hurting your marriage, the time has come to make formal action. The obvious advice here would be to go to the experts, counselors trained in this area. While this does work at times, it’s important to note that a counselor isn’t for everyone. Sometimes, if it’s a particular action that is driving issues in the relationship, you may want to see help for that issue rather than traditional marriage counseling. Sometimes, it’s more about finding the motivation to do something right than anything else.

In addition, leaning on friends and family is good for moral support, but can also sometimes lead to issues when it comes to relationship advice. These are ultimately people, with the same flaws and biases that everyone else has. Sometimes, they can be helpful, but you may want to put what they say under a close lens before trying to apply it to your relationship.

Is This Worth Saving?

When encountering marital problems, there’s often so many questions about the how things went wrong and what we can do that we often forget about whether or not a relationship is worth the effort you put into it in the first place. There are emotional and practical concerns here. For the emotional piece, if there is an uneven amount of desire to stay together, putting these things into practice may be delaying the inevitable rather than making a valiant last stand.

Practically, if a couple has been together for a short period of time, they may not have any children or joint assets built together. In this regard, divorce would be a lot easier to go through, if a relationship has become unhealthy or one party has no interest in saving it. By all means, use the methods here to try and help. But if they fail or a lack of interest is obvious, divorce may be a better choice than continuing to invest in a poor relationship.

When a divorce comes around, it’s important to make the transition as smooth and fair as possible. Your best asset here is an experienced and professional divorce lawyer. Get more info at the following page: emotional and practical concerns

Comments

  1. Cynthia R says

    Marriage is hard even with two great people. Communication and common goals in life are two things I find that can normally keep a couple together.

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